Quarantine Life Part 1: Relationships

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I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted here. It’s been a lot trying to get through the current stay at home order. I’ve observed something about relationships during this quarantine life. I’m going to write a three-part series, including this post about my direct and indirect experiences that the quarantine life has impacted. I was in a relationship before this coronavirus changed our lives drastically. Once the stay at home order started my relationship eventually changed. I let him stay with me (in hindsight, that was a bad idea)for three weeks. Honestly, I learned an infinite amount about myself into two categories, what I did well and what needs improvement. I realized within those three weeks how incompatible we were. He was happy as he got everything he wanted, but my needs not so much.

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There were red flags that kept coming up that I tried to look past. Let’s say something came up that I couldn’t ignore anymore. With the help of the quarantine, it allowed us to speed things up and notice that we weren’t right for each other. No love lost as you live and learn. The pro to this situation is that it saved me heartache later on. I discovered this information in less than two months as opposed to four/five months down the line. That sounds like a blessing to me. I’ve never lived with a man before, so that was a significant growing pain for me. I have to be with someone I’m compatible with, as it will be much easier to compromise within a relationship. When you’re with someone, you have a deep connection with compromising will come naturally. Unfortunately, my newfound relationship was short lived. I gained knowledge that now I know the changes I’m making are in the right direction. Now I need to find someone I’m more connected with, and that will be my last relationship (God willing!).

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I notice that relationships are taking a toll during this time as well. I heard my neighbors arguing across the hall the other week. I never want to be in a relationship like that. The way the woman was yelling at her boyfriend, I thought I was in trouble. Sorry not sorry, but if someone can yell at you, then it’s time to go. I always believed that if someone could yell, then they can raise their hand to you. I don’t have time for either situation, so I’m out, no, thank you. I can see why domestic violence is going up if this is the situation folks are experiencing. I know a few people who’s relationships have ended due to the quarantine. I guess their relationship couldn’t handle the proximity to each other. That’s something I don’t understand either. If you’re with someone you can’t stand, then how did the relationship occur? The new criteria to add to your dating questionnaire is, can you be quarantine with this person? If the answer is no, then keep it moving. You’re going to be spending massive amounts of time with this person, so you should want to be around them.

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Stop getting into relationships with people you only spent limited amount of time getting to know. I have a few coworkers who were complaining about not being back at work. I asked them why, and the response was they couldn’t stand their spouse. Again I’m confused as to why a person would marry someone they don’t like. The quarantine life is going to show different aspects of a relationship. Either it’s stable, and this situation will only make things healthier, or the relationship will be coming apart at the seams. Of course, this time will be difficult on everyone, and it’s essential to be with someone who will help you through this event. I suffer from anxiety, and while I was still in my relationship, it took a beating. It was something about that relationship that was bothering my spirit. God has a way of telling us things if we would only listen. It took me going through that rough patch to realize it was time to move on. Better late than never as it could’ve been worst.

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Being in the home 24/7 is an emotional blow to anyone, particularly those who suffer from mental health issues. My anxiety was through the roof for the first few weeks of the stay at home order. I would have panic attacks, and I had trouble sleeping. What has been a tremendous help to me is exercising, yoga, meditation, reading, writing, virtual happy hours, and my all-time favorite therapy. There are so many other things you could be doing during this time. I’m sure there is something you want to do that you’ve been putting off. Now is the perfect time as any to focus on those goals that have been on the back burner. The bright side of this is that it will give you something else to discuss. Talking about the same thing over and over becomes tedious, especially during this time. Bringing something else to the table will break up the monotony. Let’s try something different since you don’t have anything better to do. You mind as well be more constructive with your time. I saw someone who made a dress and put braids in her hair, thanks to YouTube University. Be creative and Glow Up! By the way, that’s the title of the second part of this series.

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Don’t forget to get involved in the discussion questions below:

Has the quarantine impacted your relationships in a positive or negative light?
What steps are you taking to help keep yourself sane during this time?

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The Blogger Recognition Award

I have received a nomination for The Blogger Recognition Award. I am incredibly grateful for this nomination, and I am happy that my writing resonates with people out there.  I want to thank Pamela at https://rollinwiththerollins.net/ for this nomination. Pamela’s blog is about spreading love, light, and positivity into the world. Be sure to check out her blog as I know you will enjoy it as much as I have.

My Journey

I started my blog due to my severe issues with depression at the time. I recently started therapy again, and I was a bit embarrassed that I had allowed myself to get back to this point. Discussing mental health is always a touchy topic to bring up. I kept hearing and seeing stories about other people who were dealing with similar issues. I wanted others to know that they weren’t alone and there’s nothing wrong with seeking help. Then I decided to discuss further on how to improve all relationships in one’s life including family, friends, romantic and the most important one with yourself. The best way to develop these relationships is through self-love which is the route of true happiness. I want everyone to live their best life now!

My Advice

Plan out your content as early and often as possible. The purpose of this is to ensure that you keep your blog up to date with the latest content. Once you are building your blog, you want to ensure that your readers have the most recent information to read. You don’t want to have too many gaps between your posts. That will interfere with the following you’re trying to build for your blog. Consistency is critical to continue your growth and to make your brand.

Be sure to network as much as possible to grow your blog. The #writingcommunity on Twitter is a great place to start with building your network. Having a secure system can have your blog grow, and these are people who can be mentors to you. It can be a lonely world out here in the blogosphere so having strong support is very helpful.  Also, work on becoming a guest contributor on another blog. That will help to increase your exposure to more groups of people as well.

The Rules:

Once you receive a nomination, there are rules for the Blogger Recognition Award:

  1. Thank the blogger for nominating you and give the link to their blog.
  2. Write a blog post on your site displaying the award.
  3. Describe the story of why you started your blog.
  4. Write two pieces of advice you have for new bloggers.
  5. Nominate 15 more bloggers.
  6. Notify each of your nominees of their nomination.

My nominations

Please check out the bloggers below. I enjoyed their work, and I’m sure you’ll love it as well.

1. https://jnycoleh.com/

2. https://sunshinewithsavannah.com/

3. https://tammysreadinglife.wordpress.com/

4. https://sunshineandrobins.wordpress.com/

5. https://jessierenea.com/

6. https://mytrinketsoflife.com/

7. https://momminintherealworld.com/

8. https://writtenbyca.wordpress.com/

9. https://averageluke.com/

10. https://makeitultrapsychology.wordpress.com/

11. https://nyxiesnook.com/

12. https://nishlovepink.com/

13. http://rheaevangelista.com/

14. https://thismansjourney.net/

15. https://gingermomandcompany.com/